We pick up the dialog after Dave’s interview of me where he asked me what the audience still doesn’t know about Brad Kearns. I stumbled to find an answer but as we continued talking I realized that I tend to be non-confrontational in life and on podcast interviews such that I might be giving my entire unfiltered opinion at all times. Dave makes a great argument that disagreement and respectful debate is healthy and necessary to have an authentic relationship.
The show continues at a fast pace to Dave’s breakthrough insights presented in his popular book The Imperative Habit. You’ll learn the importance of accessing the space between stimulus and response to be able to control your response. You’ll learn about the complex interplay between biology and spirituality and the importance of healthy synchronization between them. Great example: jumping in the cold tub to obtain a positive spiritual experience, in the process overriding your biological aversion to experiencing cold water. Dave’s take on happiness is that you simply need to remove the things in life that don’t make you happy, and you will be left with a default state of being of happiness.
Dave discusses how to break free from the harmful subconscious programming that I describe in detail on my breather show covering the insights in Dr. Bruce Lipton’s Biology of Belief. We talk about the evolutionary adaptations of the human and how we need to continue to seek opportunities for personal growth in a comfortable, modern life. Yes indeed, more wild times are enjoyed every time we connect with Dave Rossi for an interview. Grab his book The Imperative Habit on Amazon.
TIMESTAMPS:
The author of The Imperative Habit is back rethinking the notion that we should attach ourselves to the outcome rather than the journey itself. [01:51]
Maybe it’s okay once in a while to get into contention or controversy. [05:11]
Listeners are operating at their highest level of consciousness, understanding, and intelligence. [09:17]
You can have healthy debates and not have conflict. [14:10]
It’s not the event that makes you upset, it is your belief in them that does. [17:29]
Depending on your upbringing your emotions will be different. You are programmed between the ages of zero and eight. [20:02]
Everything you like has been programmed. [24:59]
Happiness as an emotion and happiness as a state of being are two different things. [28:22]
You have the power to make choices. When you feel hungry, it doesn’t necessarily mean you have to eat. [30:45]
The brain will fool us into thinking something that’s true when maybe it’s not true. [32:23]
If you follow the seven habits in Dave’s book, you are going to be able to create inner stability and not sabotage yourself. [36:45]
Gratitude is accepting what I have. [38:14]
The more you break your biology, the more you’re going to create a reverence for other lives. [41:19]
If you let go of the things that make you unhappy, you will be left with happiness. [49:43]
LINKS:
- Brad’s Shopping Page
- Dave Rossi
- The Imperative Habit
- Podcast with Dave and Brad
- The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F**k.
- Everything is F****d
- Brad’s Cold Therapy
QUOTES:
- “Dr. David Hopkins says 78% of the population is below the positive line between positive vibrating energy and negative vibrating energy.”
- “If you can’t say or do exactly what you want to do to make your life better, you’re not conscious.”
- “The human body, as a biological unit, has one algorithm, and that’s survival. So, a kid playing video games is in a comfort zone, and spirituality, to me, is making choices beyond the body. It’s tough every single day when I get into that tub! But I consciously make a choice above my biology to do something that I know is good for me.”
- “Happiness doesn’t come from things, happiness doesn’t come from anyone else, or anything external. Happiness comes from within.”
- “Your brain is like a computer, and consciousness is the user.”
- “Manifestation happens when you’re manifesting things for the highest purpose, and when you believe they can happen.”
LISTEN:
Powered by RedCircle
Download Episode MP3Sponsors
Check out each of these companies because they are absolutely awesome or they wouldn’t occupy this revered space. Seriously, Brad won’t sell out to anyone if he doesn’t love the product. Ask anyone.
- Almost Heaven Sauna: Affordable at-home sauna kits for the ultimate relaxation and hormonal boost on demand
- Brad’s Macadamia Masterpiece: Mind-blowing, life-changing nut butter blend
- CAR.O.L bike: Cardiovascular optimized logic stationary bike for a highly effective eight-minute workout
- Male Optimization Formula with Organs (MOFO): Optimize testosterone naturally with 100% grassfed animal organ supplement
- Perfect Keto: The cleanest, purest, most potent ketone supplements and snacks
- LetsGetChecked: At-home medical testing with great prices, quick results, and no hassles
- Vuori Activewear: The most comfortable, functional, and fashionable gear, evoking the chill SoCal coastal lifestyle
This free podcast offering is a team effort from Brad, Daniel, Siena, Gail, TJ, Vuk, RedCircle, our awesome guests, and our incredibly cool advertising partners. We are now poised and proud to double dip by both soliciting a donation and having you listen to ads! If you wanna cough up a few bucks to salute the show, we really appreciate it and will use the funds wisely for continued excellence. Go big (whatever that means to you…) and we’ll send you a free jar of Brad’s Macadamia Masterpiece as a thank you! Email to alert us! Choose to donate now, later, or never. Either way, we thank you for choosing from the first two options…
Get Over Yourself Podcast
Brad (1m 51s): Welcome back. I think for the third time, maybe the fourth time. It’s Dave Rossi, author of The Imperative Habit, my spiritual guide and mentor. This guy is on such an amazing and wonderful path. Rethinking all of these flawed notions that have become part of culture, where we identify and attach ourselves to the outcome of what we’re doing. That’s why I love him on the podcast. He honors the theme of getting over yourself and just being present and accepting. Remember his seven habits from his book, the Imperative Habit. Number one is accept. Number two is, do not fear the outcome. Number three, happiness as a practice. Brad (2m 31s): And his tidbit there is to remove the things in your life that make you unhappy and all you’re left with is happiness. Number four, be present. Number five, do not judge. Number six respond. Did you say respond instead of react? Yes. He did respond with love and compassion at all times. And number seven is have faith. So I think you will love the first two shows I did with him, where he talked a little more in depth about the content of his book. But in this show it feels like kind of an open mic night. We actually just kept the recording going after we did our formal program where Dave Rossi interviewed me, but I said, you know what? Brad (3m 13s): I got to keep recording. Cause every time you wind this guy up, he will unload with a stream of incredible insights. Many of them are pretty complex and in depth. So you have to reflect, maybe push the back button on the, on your recording device, your podcast, playing device and listen again. That’s what I do. Cause some of it just is really tough to grasp out of the out of the gate or he’ll make a profound comment that requires a lot of reflection. So yeah, don’t do the 1.5 or the one point sometimes beat on this show, do it at 1.0 at 1.25, at least listen, enjoy Dave Rossi. And you know, what we picked up was when he asked me on my interview, when he interviewed me, he says, what are you not revealing to your audience? Brad (3m 60s): And I finally came up with something and we’re going to get into that at the start of the show and then carry on. We’re going to bring in some insights from the amazing Mark Manson, the modern philosopher of our times. Number one, bestselling author of The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F**k. and his sequel book. Everything is F****d. A book about hope. I had him on the show. It was a life changing interview. And a lot of the Dave’s work is sort of aligned with this new look at spirituality, this kind of a broader perspective than the things that have brought us to present day with sort of these dated and constrained ideals in society. Yes, a wild show indeed. Brad (4m 40s): So the interview jumps into an abrupt starting point because I just pushed the record button while we were talking offline. After he finished interviewing me for that podcast. And we get into the juicy topic of what am I hiding or not being fully authentic as a podcast host. And I finally realized maybe I’m not as confrontational as some other people because I don’t like the conflict and I just let my guests roll and go with the flow and be the honored guests on the podcast. But Dave is making a great point about calling people out and having it be okay once in a while to get into contention and controversy, whether it’s in real life or on a podcast. Brad (5m 22s): So that’s the jumping in point. Let’s hear what Brad Kearns has to say when he’s backed into a corner. Oh, interesting stuff. Here we go. Dave Rossi. And then we get further into a really good groove into his major, take away actionable insights about spirituality and looking at the world and looking at yourself in a different way, much more healthy. Yeah, here we go. Dave (5m 45s): I’m not trying to change your mind. Granted, if you fight too hard for your side is now edging. Try to change their minds. So you say it once. Look, I don’t, I don’t understand it that way. I could be wrong. I may not understand entirely well, but That’s what I think right now said. You’ll never argue with your guests. I think you have to call people out on that. Brad (6m 6s): Yeah. So that, that’s, that’s what I’m hiding is that, you know, that that’s speaking my truth at the expense of being controversial and it might not be in a, a guest format because you know, I’m inviting guests that are in, in some ways contributing to the confirmation bias. I’m not going to have people on there that are extremely radical or disparate to what I believe is important. Right. Although I did try to get rip on there for a healthy exchange of a counter opinion,.But also just offering that opinion out about real life circumstances. I try to stay away from politics on the show because you can consume politics on other shows, but you know, part of me wants to WhatsApp. Dave (6m 47s): We only see a very small percentage of the light spectrum. Brad (6m 50s): Yeah. Dave (6m 51s): And how do we f*****g know what a planet looks like when we only see a very small percentage of the light spectrum? Like anything that we think we know even from science is so jaded from our minimal ability to comprehend certain concepts. So every opinion that you have and every opinion that he has is certainly completely bias to your own programming and your own way in which you’re filtering science. So it’s okay to say, I don’t understand that the same way. And that debate to me is incredibly healthy because I don’t know which way to go. I want to hear what you have to say, and I want to hear what you have to say, and I understand your programming is different. Your background is different than I understand your program is different and your background is different. And I don’t even know where my programming and background fits in. Dave (7m 34s): But listening to both of you speak about your opinions, helped me kind of figure out how it fits into my decision making process. That debate is really healthy to me. Brad (7m 43s): Yeah, I think it is. Yeah. And it’s probably, we probably have enough, you know, backstabbing and criticisms to go around. So I don’t need to slam David Goggins on my show for putting out a message that can be, you know, extremely warped and unhealthy and you know, indicative of his void in his life that he’s trying to fill by doing extreme endurance challenges and, and glorifying those which many people are drawn to at the expense of their marriage, their health, their balanced lifestyle, their role as a parent. You know, they’re out there peddling their bicycle training for the Ironman and it’s really escaping facing the reality of their life, but you’re not going to hear me say that on a show and criticize the endurance movement in that manner or the ultra runners that you know, I know, but let’s reframe that. Dave (8m 32s): I would reframe that and say has nothing to do with Dave Goggins and God bless him for doing what he’s doing. I only wish I only wish that listeners can open their minds to new perspectives and see different ways in which endurance training could also be accomplished other ways in which it could be. And that clearly he’s gaining a lot of listeners that are drawn to that one type. And I hope those listeners can open their minds and expand their programming to be open to higher levels and different levels of endurance training than just that, Brad (9m 17s): Right. Just the lowest common denominator, how much can you suffer. Dave (9m 21s): That’s kind of how I would frame that and have nothing against what he Dave says. And I don’t want to say anything insulting against his listeners. It’s just, they’re all operating at their highest level of consciousness. Let’s use your highest level of intelligence instead of consciousness or their highest level of understanding instead of the word consciousness, they’re all operating at their highest level of consciousness, understanding and intelligence, and I wish they could up level or upgrade those levels to connect, to listen, to understand and maybe apply other types of endurance training practices. Brad (9m 60s): Well, I wonder what you think of this when you frame that message. So gracefully sometimes in life, it just kind of flies over people’s heads, cause it’s not hard hitting enough and maybe we get a bigger wake up call. And of course, this is what the, the salacious news broadcasts are about is, is the shock value of the news gets higher ratings. And so, you know, here I am on my show being, making graceful, respectful commentary with all about all with and about all my guests and about all the stuff that’s going on. And I’m never really calling people out in that aggressive manner, but in my own life and my own personal life, the people who have, you know, been the most extreme in their point of view have influenced me more than more than anyone else. Brad (10m 50s): And I have great appreciation for people that, you know, get, get in my face and call out, call me out on my b******t or whatever in a manner that I would never do myself. It’s sort of like, you know, counter to how I operate. Dave (11m 3s): I appreciate your things though. I think you’re saying two things. Number one, when you say extreme you out, you, you have, when you’re defining something as something and you’re, you’re using the word extreme as a definition, you have to be comparing it to some other standard. So you’re saying, Hey, this, this guy has given me extreme advice, but that extreme advice is you determining it’s extreme based on what you think is not extreme. So that’s resonating with you. And I think what you’re also saying is that a lot of people who are extreme based on maybe the masses have a larger following and have more appeal and they’re getting more followers or more, more attention. Dave (11m 48s): And, and that is the lowest common denominator for these audiences that may, but there’s only so many people that, that are along the path far enough from the caterpillar to the butterfly that are going to speak butterfly language. And that’s okay. There might be a lot more butter, a lot more caterpillars of than butterflies. Dr. David Hawkins in his science to 78% of the population is below the vibrational energy level of positive and negative energy. 78% of the world is below the positive line between positive vibrated, energy and negative vibrating energy, which says 78% of the population to me is on the caterpillar side and butterfly side. Dave (12m 34s): And so for me that the spiritual value or spiritual rule that I want to uphold is to continue to espouse what I feel strongly about where my knowledge base sits. And I got to tone the words I use down sometimes to explain things more caterpillarist, but I’m not changing the fact that I’m shooting high and I’m asking people to shoot high. And I think you’re the same way. You can’t be Dave Goggins and speak grunt caterpillar to a lot of people that like it. You’re speaking to people that want to be athletes that want to have peak performance and that’s going to be a smaller audience. Dave (13m 18s): And the real thing is to convert the people at the lower levels of consciousness for the lower levels of endurance, understanding the low, lower levels of endurance intelligence and bring them up, the market is big to bring them up. We’re hitting this market up here and other people are hitting it down there. That’s great. Like people compare some of my stuff a little bit as like the next step past a Michael Singer or Gabby Bernstein. And certainly the Angela, the girl that I’m seeing, loved Gabby and then she’s like, yeah, you know, it’s not so interesting anymore appealing anymore because now she’s going into deeper, deeper understandings of the word gratitude. Then the way she uses gratitude, you know what I’m saying? Dave (13m 60s): It’s enough. Does it have enough teeth she’s graduating to it, more intense or deeper or understanding of consciousness or a higher level of intelligence, you know, Brad (14m 9s): Yeah. Stepping stone. Sure. Dave (14m 10s): And you can, you can have those healthy debates and not have conflict. I think you should tell yourself that. Look, I want to have a, I wanna, I want to share my view that accomplished way and see and see where that goes. Brad (14m 26s): I like it. Yeah. That’s, that’s definitely, I can strive to do that. Dave (14m 31s): I think that’s good. Yeah. Sorry guys. Look, I’m not calling you to get yes, man. I obviously love what you’re doing and love your science and I love your products, but you know, in all honesty, I got to keep it real and that may come out. So just be aware of it. Brad (14m 47s): Love it. Maybe it will come out first between me and you on the next show. I don’t know, Dave, do you get off saying that? Yeah, let’s try it. All right, man. Dave (14m 55s): No, I absolutely really, really love that. That part of it, people that I talked to that I think, and I don’t mean this in a, in a negative way at all. Just have a lower level of understanding to spirituality or consciousness. And they’ll say things to me. And all I want to say is, wow, like you really don’t understand this at all, but I always stop myself. And I say before, I think that maybe I don’t. Brad (15m 26s): WOOO love it. Dave (15m 28s): Yeah. I got to really really know I’m someone that practices this everyday. I’m like you, I’m reading every day. I’m practicing every day. I’m meditating twice a day. I’m really pushing my brain and pushing my vulnerability and surrendering and accepting and letting go and letting myself, you know, following the laws of the universe. Right. And then find someone that may be, have some reg listened to a couple of soul SuperSoul Sundays. And they’re telling me what is is, and I’m about to go, like maybe, I don’t know, maybe they are right. What could, what could I be missing? You know? Brad (16m 5s): Yeah, yeah. Dave (16m 6s): You have to go there. Brad (16m 7s): What can I learn from them? Even though they seem to know less than me, just like my example of learning from my kid, you know, the know-it-all parent throwing down the hammer and then the kid takes the hammer and redirects it a skillfully. Yeah. Those are wonderful experiences. Dave (16m 24s): Yeah. And so I think for you, that debate is good because, and I don’t, I love those debates because even if you challenged me, I would go, Hmm, maybe you’re right. I don’t know. This is what I’ve come to know, but you could be right. I will think about that. I absolutely could be. Right. I don’t think that’s healthy and Brad (16m 42s): well and actually mean it too. Cause I’m the type of person that will say that. And really I’m crossing my fingers thinking you’re so full of s**t. But thank you for that insight. I’ll think about that. But you know, it’s just like you told me the steps of, you know, I asked you, so I’m understanding, you know, John Gray’s insights to be calm, cool, collected male, emotional regulation and, and, you know, keep, keep things under control. But then what if I’m doing, you know, my, my partner does something that annoys the crap out of me, but I smile. I don’t react. I’m okay. But inside I have that reaction and you said like the next level of growth is to not have it annoy the crap out of you either. Brad (17m 24s): So not only do you not have a reaction, you aren’t bothered by it. Dave (17m 29s): The first level of growth is not saying it cause that consummates your act. And I’ll use a couple other famous people here. It was Epictetus a Greek philosopher who was the basis for Dr. Albert Ellis, his groundbreaking therapy of modern day cognitive behavioral therapy. It was Epictetus that said, it’s not events that make you, it’s your belief in them that does . .And so when you’re about to get angry, it’s a belief that, that this shouldn’t be happening to you. So the first thing we have to do, and I said this in my book is I don’t get this from Viktor Frankl. Grab that moment in time between stimulus and response where all your growth is, if you can’t say or do exactly what you want to do to make your life better than you’re not conscious. Dave (18m 21s): And as you begin to grab that moment in time, like Victor Frankl talked about in his book, the moment in time between stimulus between stimulus and response was a small moment in time. And in that moment in time, all of our growth comes from, if you can’t grab that moment in time, then you’re instantly doomed. And once you have the awareness to grab that moment in time in an argument, and then number two, think about your goal. What’s my goal to have a wonderful relationship with this person. What can I say next to meet that goal? If you can’t do exactly what you think in your heart will get you closer to that goal, then you’re not conscious. And that’s a powerful thing to have that level of consciousness. Brad (19m 5s): Yeah. You’re out of control. If you can’t, you can’t control your response. You’re a victim. You’re a victim of all the mean people in your life. You’re, you’re a victim of all these people that have wronged you in your life, Right? Dave (19m 19s): And any level of, of being bothered, this is where the emotion stuff comes in any. And I said this in my book, you know, cause effect, causes stimulus effect emotion, okay? Cause it stimulus. My wife is yelling at me or she’ll leave a towel on the floor or whatever. Any amount of discomfort that runs through your body is an emotional response. That’s biological, it’s anger, it’s disappointment. It’s frustration is jealousy. Whatever it is is only being produced because the programming in your brain, your body, your person, your upbringing can compare to the stimulus that you’re experiencing produces. Dave (19m 59s): I’m bothered. If that programming was different, you came from a poor town in India, or you came from Africa or you came from a calm Japanese home and your wife did this. You would have no emotion. Your emotion would be different if the programming was different. Brad (20m 18s): And do you believe the programming was mostly loaded between eight, zero and seven? Like Bruce Lipton and yeah, Dave (20m 26s): Liptin talks about that, but it continued. So this is what happens from zero to seven. Your operating system gets developed your lenses and then you begin to look at all new programming through those lenses. You’re constantly being programmed, but you’re programmed on the train tracks of the predominant zero to seven train tracks. I look at things negative. So your whole life is still gathering programming, but it’s on this train track Brad (20m 54s): to confirm the train track. Dave (20m 57s): Well, as any, any way you grew up say, look, the human body has one prerequisite for survival. And Dr. Stephen Hawkins said this, and what is the prerequisite for survival? Don’t say intelligence. Brad (21m 14s): One prerequisite for survival? Dave (21m 17s): Yes. Brad (21m 17s): I guess being able to breathe comes to mind. Dave (21m 20s): I mean, your species it’s adaptability. The species that is the most adaptable will survive. Brad (-): Yeah. Dave (21m 28s): But the human body is adaptable, but it also has a thing called homeostasis. And so from zero to seven, the reason why our brain is programmed, the way it is, is to survive in the environment that it’s in. It’s like a tree growing around a rock look for light. We are a biological unit looking to survive in the environment that we’re put put in, Oh, there’s a rock in my way. I’m going to grow over here and get away from this rock so I can get some light. Then we begin to change environments. And the homeostasis like, wait a minute. This is not the environment I’m used to surviving. And I need to get back to this environment. I need breaking homeostasis is difficult. We’re only adaptable to a point because we may be out of our element and survival was back in our element. Dave (22m 12s): So we fight to get back. That’s what we hate change so much as a biological impediment to survival to change. Albeit adaptability is our survival skill. You see what I’m saying? Brad (22m 24s): Sure, sure. We’re we’re compelled to in a life or death circumstances of evolution, evolutionary pressure, selection, pressure. So our, most of our existence has been the, the compulsion to adapt or die. And so now finally, we’re here in comfortable, modern life where we don’t really have to. We can sit and play video games and order pizza on Door Dash for the rest of our lives. And that’s where we, we suffer and we lose our potential for happiness and contentment because we’re, we can be turned into softies that have no, no, sir, no, no adaptability and no, no departure from homeostasis. Dave (23m 4s): Right? But it’s sort of ability, right? And those moments are the human body as a biological unit, like a tree or a dog or a worm has one algorithm, which is survival and comfort falls into that algorithm of survival. And so a kid playing video games is in a comfort zone, right? That’s a biological drive and an addiction to comfort. It’s chemicals being injected for comfort. And spirituality to me is making choices beyond the body. Like, I’m going to go jump in a cold tub. I don’t know about you, but it’s tough. Every single day I jumped on that tab. Is it gotten easier for you? It hasn’t gotten easier for me. Brad (23m 46s): It’s gotten easier. Dave (23m 47s): It hasn’t get warmer faster, Brad (23m 50s): But the part that’s easier is once you get in and go into my breathing. But I still tell the story in my mind every day. And like, you know what, I should really sweep the kitchen floor first. And then I’ll put the, I’ll put the crockpot stuff on and start that eight hour timer and then go in the cold tub. And I realize, Oh, you’re doing it again. So that part, I think, I can’t say I’ve overcome that where I’m just like, Dave (24m 17s): Let’s talk about that. Why is that? Why, why, what I know to me, I want to know what you know, why is that? Yes, Brad (24m 22s): it’s uncomfortable. Dave (24m 24s): Right? So it’s the biology, biological side looking for survival. And the reason why you get in is your spiritual side, same. I’m going to go beyond what my body wants. I’m going to consciously make a choice above my biology to do what I know is good for me. Brad (24m 46s): I guess that’s the same for someone who’s trying to run their a hundred mile run or climb to the top of the mountain. Is they diet? Yeah. Or change the diet, I guess, because Dave (24m 56s): relationships, Brad (24m 57s): how so? In relationships Dave (24m 59s): That’s being swayed by someone that’s biologically more compatible chemistry. I’m going to go sway towards chemistry. Even though I know this is bad for me, way by chemistry. Cause I always pick the wrong mate, because I don’t know. I’m really drawn to them. That’s programming. Everything you like, including the color has been programmed. I’m not saying that someone just plugs have been in your head and you’re like, Oh, you’re going to like this. No, it’s something you were exposed to. And just because you’re exposed the color red doesn’t mean you’re going to love the color red. It means the color red has been affect you. You may hate the color red because you’re exposed to color red. But the point is you were programmed because you’re getting this in you, you see what I’m saying? And so now you’re pro everything you like is programmed. Dave (25m 42s): Everything. Every opinion you have is on your program. There is no independent thought in your brain because the inner is the computer part of your brain has been programmed. Brad (25m 54s): So if we’re awakening to this idea and maybe frustrated that we’re, you know, we’re, we’re in a rut, we keep getting drawn to the wrong things or things that end up making us feeling unhappy. How do we escape and kind of open the programming, turned on the, the software to, to get rewritten. Dave (26m 19s): Well, number one, you said the word happiness. And you said it in a way as if happiness always isn’t always within you. So that’s, that’s a, that’s a belief that you have to have a thing to make you happy. And certainly people want to feel happy and because they want to feel happy, they think they need things to make them happy. And you really don’t. Brad (26m 42s): Well, what if I have s****y? And I keep playing out this s****y program. Dave (26m 47s): Yeah. We got to change the programming. So that’s where consciousness comes in. That’s where spirituality comes in. That’s where I use it. Athletics. As an example, my legs are tired. You need to stop running now, Brad, no I’m training. I want to get a world record because I love world records and I’m Brad Kearns and I’m super awesome. So I’m going to keep on going no Brad seriously. Like our legs are really tired. We have lactic acid and the muscles are giving us signals that this is really bad. Yeah. I know legs. This is really bad, but I’m going to keep on going and you can use that same example with happiness. Look, you’re really unhappy. Great. Happiness doesn’t come from things. I’m going to reprogram my brain with happiness. Dave (27m 27s): It doesn’t come from things. No, seriously. Like we love to eat ice cream at night and we’re, we’re kind of sad. And ice cream makes us feel really, really good. Yeah. But happiness doesn’t come from things like ice cream. I know what feels good, but it’s not really good. It’s a biological chemical of happiness, like serotonin or dopamine or the little stuff in my brain. That, that, that happens to me when I eat ice cream. Okay. So let’s not do it. Okay. I won’t do it, but I’m in a bad mood. Don’t want to go yell at my spouse and that’s been making me feel better. And now we’ll be happy that happiness doesn’t come from things. Happiness doesn’t come from somebody else. Happiness doesn’t come from anything external. I’m going to reprogram my brain and realize that happiness comes from within. Dave (28m 8s): And when you be programming your brain to realize that you don’t need ice cream to be happy, then guess what happens? You don’t need ice cream to be happy. It doesn’t happen overnight. That doesn’t mean their ice cream won’t make them happy. Sure. Well, it’s a chemical happiness. It’s a difference between happiness as an emotion and happiness as a state of being are two different things. There is something driving you to want to eat that ice cream. Let’s remove that cost. Then the need will go away and what’s left is happiness. Brad (28m 46s): Right? You get out of your own way. Yes. And all of a sudden, you open yourself up to life ain’t that bad after all, if I could just turn off my, my internal tapes that are telling me I’m not good enough or what have you. Dave (29m 0s): Well, and all that programming. When you understand that your, your brain is like a computer and your consciousness is the user, right? So I’m, I’m the user. And I’m going to hit play on the program and I’m going to go to sleep. What review of the user? The consciousness goes and the program is now running. Hey, we just got a stimulus. Someone has photos were s******d. Oh f**k. That person let’s swear at them. Now I feel like s**t. Like they don’t like me, but then they told us girl, I like it. I’m a s**t head too. That makes it feel really uncomfortable. I’m going to go on the ice cream now because I don’t, I feel like s**t. I feel really guilty. I just, you down, I’m going to go run at six at night because I had done a bias. I to feel guilty and I’m flooded with hormones of guilt, right? When the consciousness or the user is gone, we want to bring that user back and go, Whoa, Whoa, Whoa, Whoa, Whoa, Whoa. Dave (29m 46s): They can call us and s**t. It that’s okay. Yeah. My spirituality is to go beyond the programming. It stopped for the program and decide what I want to do. Decide if I like this decided this meets my goals. What response meets my goals. My goals are to live a happy life and be kind to others and to love my spouse and raise wonderful kids and all these things that I want. What is the response that I need to give this person to get my goals met or get closer to them? That’s just like athletics, right? What do I need to do to keep on running, to meet my goal of becoming a world champion? Dave (30m 27s): Having that power over your body like you do with jumping in water, you need to use for everything. Fear, stress, anxiety, doubt. Self-esteem what I like, what I don’t like. And what happens when you do that is you stop liking anything because you really don’t care about anything. And you’re really pretty happy. Brad (30m 45s): Yeah. Then, then it gives you the freedom to let’s say manifest more wealth or whatever. Whenever these things that we obsess on and get negative about, Dave (30m 57s): Well, it gives you power to make choices. Like I don’t really need to eat that I can fast. And that’s cool because me feeling hungry is just the hormone of Ghrelin in my stomach. As a signal from my brain saying, you, you need food. Then it goes down. And then Ghrelin is the hormone that says you’re hungry, m**********r. And then it starts doing other things to your body. And then it becomes this powerful drive to eat. When it’s just a biological response of your body running the way it’s supposed to run, you know, Brad (31m 26s): Ghrelin subsides in 20 minutes, the effects go away. Dave (31m 30s): But we’re, we’re programmed to respond to that because we feel we’re hungry. It doesn’t mean we actually need to eat. Brad (31m 38s): Yeah. Dave (31m 38s): It’s the same thing with, because I want to hit on that girl doesn’t mean I actually should. Biological response, responsive procreate with someone that matches my program and of what I think is attractive. Brad (31m 48s): Yeah. Dave (31m 49s): So when I see a lot of these studies by a lot of people like Brene Brown, who I love by the way, but she has a lot of studies. And the book that you, the, the, the book that you sent that you told me to read on The Obesity Code, all those studies are probably with people that don’t have any power of choice over their bodies. Brad (32m 14s): All that stuff is in a way can be discounted because they’re taking the control group is like the robots. Yeah, Dave (32m 23s): That’s right. They’re biological units that they feel hungry, they eat right. And so those studies don’t take into account. What, what choices we can make when we have the power over our biology, because we can make choices like running and exercising smart. We can make choices like jumping in cold water because we know what’s good for us. We can make choices like intermittent fasting because we know what’s good for us. We can make choices like feeding in positive relationships. And I wrote this in of my books wisdom is knowing what situations are loving and supporting for us. Power is staying in them. Brad (33m 2s): What do you mean by power? Like having power or Dave (33m 5s): Powerful in the situations that are loving supporting, it’s sometimes very difficult to understand what situations are loving and supporting. We can get very confused by that. Our biology can be delusional. Our biology can drive us to say, well, I really could eat well, we don’t need to jump on that cold water. I believed it yesterday. And I really kind of do enough. Our brains have been clinically proven to trick us. And it’s really in the book thinking fast and slow. If you’ve read that book, he talks about this experiment that they ran about a gorilla running through a basketball court and people didn’t see it. And then they said there was no gorilla that ran across a basketball court. They said, yes, there was. And people were arguing it wasn’t yes, there was, f**k you. Dave (33m 46s): I didn’t see it. And then it would put a tape when they go, Holy s**t. I didn’t even see that. Brad (33m 53s): Right. Our brains can trust studies in psychology. Yeah. You had to count the number of times. They said, count the number of times you see the basketball getting thrown and caught and then no one, no one noticed the gorilla incredible. Dave (34m 8s): And the brain will fool us into thinking something that’s true when it, maybe it’s not true. And because of that, we have to be really, really careful about what’s real. And what’s not real because we can get fooled. Brad (34m 26s): How does that apply to our discussion about manifesting and, you know, altering your course of your destiny to create exactly what you want in life? Dave (34m 36s): Well, I wrote about this in my book and I don’t know how effective it was, but you have to have authentic goals because your brain can trick you into an authentic goal. Like I have a friend of mine who was a CEO, made tons of money. She was a movie director, hit the highest highs of success and basically hit the lowest lows. And she’s doing Joe Dispenza, and she’s reading this and she’s doing that. And I’ve, I’ve coached her a little bit. And, and I’m more of the, you know, tough love kind of thing. Right? And I’m going to teach you not coach. You I’ll tell you what lessons I’ve learned from ancient texts and from experience. Right? Dave (35m 16s): And she comes to me every so often and ask these questions like it’s not working. Why isn’t it working? And I keep on telling, you gotta let go. You gotta surrender. You gotta give up. And she gets him say, I don’t understand what that means. So we’ll send it to you will. And she keeps them coming back and she says, David, I’m doing everything right. Why am I not making money? Well, there you have it. Your intentions are not for the right reasons. Brad (-): Yeah. Dave (35m 38s): What’s the perfect reason I have to survive. I need money to just fine, but there’s a, there’s a different in the intention of just making money versus doing a job that gets me by and allows me the time to focus on what I love doing. So two different intentions, her intention is I need to be back on top again. I got to get back on top again. I’m going to use spirituality to get back on top again. When you spritz, why to manifest manifesting happens when you manifest things for the highest purpose, number one. And number two, you manifest them when you believe they can happen. And to the extent you believe them is to the extent they’ll happen or the rate at which they’ll happen. Dave (36m 21s): So most people fail in those two reasons. The intentions are wrong and they don’t really believe it. Brad (36m 27s): They don’t deep down believe it. They’re dreaming. They’ve been told to do their vision board and cut out the private jet that the man of their dreams they’re going to call in who’s six two, and has a two day stubble is going to come along and take them out of their shitty life. But they don’t really believe it. They’re just going through the motions. Dave (36m 45s): Right? And I look at my book as like the, the starting point of being able to manifest because you follow those seven habits and practice them. You’re going to be able to create an inner stability and an inner voice that supports your next step rather than sabotaging it. So if you don’t have fear for the outcome, you do accept things for how they are. You don’t judge yourself for other people. You do live with loving compassion. You do focus on happiness as a state of being, not an emotion. And you do have faith. You nail those things. And I mean, it might take years. You nail those things. The next step is easy, which is I don’t need to worry about making money cause I’m happy, but I really love this. Dave (37m 26s): And I really want to have tremendous amount of success in this. And then all of a sudden these things will begin happening because you’re not sabotaging yourself anymore. This for money. I need this for stature. I should have this. They shouldn’t. Why are they getting promoted and I’m not? And all that judgment and that the unacceptance and lack of faith, you have to have faith. Let go. Brad (37m 50s): Yeah. Yeah. Luke Story, on my show said that you have to be in a state of extreme gratitude for where you are and what you have right now in order to, you know, tee yourself up to manifest a further abundance. And I thought that was a really nice way to put it because most people are looking at this from a point of desperation. And Dave (38m 14s): You know what? Let’s talk about gratitude. You’re reprogramming your brain to say outcome. Doesn’t matter. I’m grateful for what I have. And I use the phrase. Life is enough. Life is enough. I’m alive. Okay. Number two. Gratitude is I’m accepting what I have. I’m not afraid of what I don’t have. Desire is fear and I’m accepting what I have. Okay. Number three, better attitude, not judging other peoples other people and yourself cause judgment requires a standard and you need a standard to judge against when you’re grateful. You remove that standard. Okay? Number four. Gratitude is, is a step towards happiness. I’m happy with what I have. I truly am grateful for what I have. Dave (38m 55s): I’m happy with what I have. I’m grateful for being alive. Okay. Number six, loving compassion. Compassion is, and miss ms. Defined word, we can get in that later, but gratitude is giving. I’m so thankful what I have. I can give some of it away. You don’t need to protect it, right? And faith, as well as to say faith, but practice. But it’s not just having gratitude. It’s practicing gratitude because you have to believe it. And I, I use my steps as ways to help get there. Like let’s take it in digestible pieces, not a fear for the outcome, except things from where they are. Don’t judge use your practices, not to stop you from being grateful. Dave (39m 35s): Hawkins says that the only real way to increase your vibrational energy is through gratitude and reverence for life. Brad (39m 43s): Makes sense Dave (39m 44s): Because all biology can recognize one thing, all biology, trees, horses, cows, worms, bacteria can all recognize one thing. And that is what supports life. So reverence for life, gratitude, other biological things, their protoplasm, their senses. They’re a worm sense. Go up for water. The tree. I need to look deeper roots for water, right? A dog, where can I get food? They’ll all go to what they believe supports life. Dave (40m 27s): They have sensors in their selves that says this supports life, right? And as a human, if you give off the energy that you support life, reverence for life. Gratitude, then other things will recognize the support o life. And they will feel comfortable around you. They will go to you calls it a quantum attractor pattern. Brad (40m 51s): And does that include material objects like money or what is he, what is he referring to? Dave (40m 60s): The concept? It’s an idea. It’s just an idea. It’s not even real. It’s a, it’s an imagined reality, right? When he’s just an imagined reality. It’s just a thing. If you, I can tell you the more conscious I become and the more I practice, the easier animals come up to me because they’re not afraid, Brad (41m 19s): Right? The animals have that sense. Especially the dogs, domesticated animals. They can, they can sense fear and they can sense the fear and the owner. And then the dog gets, gets on a leash and barks at the other dog, instead of just, you know, it has a chill accounter in the park. Dave (41m 31s): Okay. I have this experience where a hummingbird flew into my garage up to the window and he was bumping against the window and I walked up to it and it got a little crazy. And then it stopped and I picked it up, hummingbird, picked it up, walked it outside and I just let it go. And it wasn’t afraid. I mean, those things like that happened to me more and more. I was in Brad (41m 55s): As you vibrate higher and higher as you vibrate higher and higher, Dave (42m 0s): Right. There’s reverence for life. Brad (42m 3s): And so, I mean, I’ve heard these insights applied to that, that, you know, manifesting game of attracting people who are going to lead you to open doors and, and amassing more wealth and affluence when you’re vibrating properly. And then you’re open to it rather than closed off with your head down and, and missing out on opportunities because your mindset’s not there. Dave (42m 28s): Well, you, you, you do send out energetic signatures, emotions, or energetic signatures. You just said a dog being afraid of you because you’re afraid you, you have an energetic signature, whether you like it or not. It’s it’s, it is a, it is a scientific thing, right? Yeah. Brad (42m 46s): Yeah. The self esteem, prophecy was all about the invisible energy between two people. And there’s usually a competition for power. Unless you kind of learn how to go with the flow and leverage each other’s power. And I I’m kind of referencing those insights as you described this stuff, Dave (43m 3s): but everything biological goes counter or paradoxical to spirituality. Because the biology says live, survive. Find things that support us, right? The human body with its ability for cognition, which no other animal has, is now being paired up with a biological unit. So we’re giving biology. Imagine if a dog had the cognition of a human, what that dog would be doing, right? So we’re giving our mind cognitive power with our biology. But our mind also acts on behalf of our non-physical side, this energetic side, and the more we stay away from biology, more power, we have to choose over biology. Dave (43m 49s): We create more and more reverence for life. We create more and more gratitude because a squirrel, if it has a million nuts and it’s hot on a rainy day in November is going to go out and look for more nuts the next day. Cause it doesn’t have the ability to say, I’m grateful. I have so many that’s in fact, I have so many, I can give them away. It doesn’t have that ability. It’s going to go out and look for more nuts. It’s in its nature. And we have the ability to go against our biology and have gratitude. So the more you break your biology, the more you’re going to create reverence for other lives. The more you’re going to have other beings, other it’s beyond the brain, it’s at a cellular level, humans and animals will feel safe, feel, feel safer around you. Dave (44m 40s): That’s just the way it is. And that’s your manifesting comes from you’re now pulling these things into you. Brad (44m 48s): Yeah. Yeah, Dave (44m 49s): no, it still freaks me out. Sometimes some things happen to me and miss like, Whoa, like that was just too weird. Like what, you know? Brad (44m 57s): Oh yeah. I mean, everyone can reference these stories of life. Like the incredible coincidence is of feeling desperate and scared because you don’t have any money. And then the next day a check arrives in the mail unexpectedly and, and all those kinds of things that kind of confirm that there’s something magical going on here. That’s beneath the surface or awareness or that’s, you know, measurable by science. Dave (45m 23s): Have I told you the million dollar issue I have with my business. Did I tell you about that story? Brad (45m 27s): I don’t know. Dave (45m 28s): So when my business was shutting down, my ex wife was trying to sell it without me knowing. And she eventually put two people on the board that I didn’t know that. Well. Brad (45m 38s): Yeah. You tell me some of this Dave (45m 40s): from Philadelphia. And she had an offer to sell company and she decided to have a board meeting and I know emergency board meeting in five hours. I said, I can’t make it. In fact, she said too bad. We’re going to have it without you. So I called into the meeting and I said, if anyone votes, I’m going to sue every single person on this phone call because I’m on the board and I am the CEO. And if anyone votes on this without 24 hours, without me looking into this, I will sue every single person on this phone call. So they postponed it and then went home at night and she will, they undersold the company. He was a complete fiasco. She’d already tried to sell it. The word got out, people were quitting. I’ll never forget standing outside of my house in the woods. Dave (46m 23s): I’m just like, wow. Wow. So the next day and went to the gym and it wasn’t a normal time I went to the gym. It was an abnormal time and went to the gym. And as I’m walking into the locker room, a guy I know in the industry is walking out. Couldn’t miss him in 30 seconds, 30 seconds, bam. And he says, Hey, I heard you’re selling your company. I said, yep. He says, well, I’m kind of interested. What’s what’s going on. I said, well, if you’re interested, you got eight hours to make an offer because we’re voting and eight hours. And if you’re interested, we better talk. He says, let’s talk. Just said, let’s go to coffee. Dave (47m 3s): You go to coffee. He says, tell me and write up the offer. So I don’t have to get into a p*****g contest over competing with somebody else. So I took the other offer. I had a 10% more royalties and added a million dollars, the price. And I said to him, I said, if you can do this, then we have a deal and you sit back, I can do this. And he signed a letter of intent and they made a million dollars and 10% more on the company because I ran into that guy. And he owns a company today. Brad (47m 31s): What’s, what’s your takeaway from that? Dave (47m 35s): I dunno, you take, you take away whatever you want from it. I mean, one minute 30 seconds different. I wouldn’t miss that guy. Brad (47m 44s): Yeah. I mean, that’s karma is one of them because you did your best to build that company. It, things got screwy and it turned out that you had a nice upside Dave (47m 54s): that was, I just made it just paid off more debt. Brad (47m 59s): I mean, it was, it was a more deserving transaction. Yeah. And I think that’s, you know, that’s an example of karma and I definitely believe in that you keep putting it out there and positive energy and all that. And that guy had a preexisting relationship where he respected you and trusted you. So he could make a deal in eight hours. Yeah. That’s a great one man. Dave (48m 16s): And millions of dollars. Brad (48m 18s): Yeah. Yeah. Dave (48m 19s): And I don’t know if karma is the right word as much as it is that attractor pattern of, of trust and, and reaching through the networks of things that I know to bring those things to me, I mean, in the, in the book Power Versus Force, Hopkins uses Gandhi as an example of incredible power, incredible power, power. They took no energy. Power that created energy, where the English empire was forced. It needed energy to maintain force and Gandhi did nothing to create power. He got more people on his side, he got more influenced with the country. Dave (48m 60s): He didn’t produce propaganda or produce guns or spend money or have worships. He just had a s**t ton of power, that beat force. And that was an incredibly vibrational attractor pattern to influence people. Or people said, that’s weapons for life. That’s safe. That’s going to help me. That’s what I need to do. That’s who I need to listen to. Brad (49m 28s): We still have people doing that to us every single day, sometimes in untoward manner, but trying to prey upon our receptivity to that. And then later he went and manipulate you. And it seems to me, especially with what marketing is in a way. Dave (49m 43s): Yeah, but they play, they play advertising, but they’re playing with your biology, your force, not your power. They’re playing on fear, not love. Those are two things of the same spectrum, fear and love. As you let go of fear. You create more love. It’s not all or nothing. It’s, you’re sliding up the scale. And when you have more love, you’re just shedding more fear. If you want to get rid of fear, let more of the opposite in. If you want to be more spiritual, let more of the opposite, go your biology, right? You want to have more power. Let go of the opposite force. Dave (50m 26s): Power is letting go. Forces holding on. Right? Power is, is non-resistance forces resistance. You see what I’m saying? You have to let the other end at the same time. You’re shedding the others you’re you’re doing, you’re hearing it from both sides. Brad (50m 45s): Same with being happy as a state of being, yeah, Just let go of a lot of your ruminations in your mind and all those things Dave (50m 54s): You let go of the things that make you unhappy and will be left is happiness. And that practice of getting rid of stress and anxiety and fear help you have to reprogram your brain. Cause you’re only afraid of sending because your brain says you should be afraid of it. If you were programming your brain, you will no longer be afraid of it. Like I use my example with my son who has some depression. I said, if there was a kid in London that had a privileged life, wonderful life of privilege and all of a sudden the family, something happens to them and they have to move to a crappy tract Brad (51m 26s): home in East San Jose on ABC street. Dave (51m 30s): Okay. How would that kid feel like? Well, he’d probably be sad. Okay. Now let’s take a kid from the slums of Mumbai. Who’s never lived in a house before who can barely have food and water. And something happens with his family wonderfully and they move into a house in East San Jose next door. What’s he going to feel? So what will happen? Same house, same street, two different positionalities can create two entirely different emotions. So our programming creates the emotion, not the situation itself. And so you practice recreating those, changing those programs. Dave (52m 12s): I do it all the time. I’m not always like this. I do have moments where I’m like, f**k. And then I go, wait a minute, wait a minute, wait a minute. That f**k I just my brain. And then way I was raised and I can get rid of that and then just go away, go away, come on and go away. We haven’t gone away yet. My go away, go away, go away. Brad (52m 29s): Love it, man. A daily practice, Dave (52m 32s): Every moment. It’s more than daily. It’s all the time. Brad (52m 35s): Dave Rossi, The Imperative Habit. Go grab it on Amazon. Right. It’s for sale and ready for a life transformation. Dave (52m 42s): Yeah. And let’s, let’s do the biology thing, something like that. So while we would just talk about cause and effect, stimulus and emotion, Brad (52m 50s): that’s on our next show. So we had a wonderful show here, right off the cuff spontaneous. And I thank you for, for all those insights. I was a great journey and yeah, we’ll get into the, the biology next time. Dave (53m 5s): Alright. Sounds good. Brad (53m 5s): Dave Rossi, people. Thank you for listening to the show. We would love your feedback at getoveryourselfpodcast@gmail.com. And we would also love if you could leave a rating and a review on iTunes or wherever you listen to podcasts, I know it’s a hassle. You have to go to desktop iTunes, click on the tab that says ratings and reviews and then click to rate the show anywhere from five to five stars. And it really helps spread the word so more people can find the show and get over themselves because they need to thanks for doing it.
